Is my loved-one safe to…? A three-part article.
Updated: Sep 7
As a mother, I remember struggling with the concept of leaving my son home alone, or when it was time for him to learn to drive or prepare his own taxes. Fast forward years later, I find myself having similar emotions when it comes to considering if it’s safe for my parents to keep driving, to do their own finances, or manage medications.
Just as there are no set age limits for children to be ready to handle certain life responsibilities on their own, there is no set age for when an adult should no longer be managing their own affairs. In fact, the answer with both age groups is, it depends.’
So, what signs tell us when it might be time for someone to stop driving or when a person is no longer safe to manage their medications or finances? What should we be looking for to determine if mom or dad can CONTINUE TO live alone with no help?
According to various experts, there are warning signs we can watch for to help with these questions.
Part One – When is it time to stop driving?
The NHTSA (https://www.nhtsa.gov/) advises family members to look for the following indicators that an elderly driver may need to stop driving, such as:
Drifting into other lanes.
Straddling lanes.
Making sudden lane changes.
Ignoring or missing stop signs and traffic signals.
Increased confusion while driving in traffic.
Braking or stopping abruptly without cause.
Accelerating suddenly without reason.
Coasting to a near stop amid moving traffic.
Pressing simultaneously on the brake and accelerator pedals while driving.
Difficulty seeing pedestrians, objects and other vehicles.
Increasing levels of anxiety while driving.
Driving significantly slower than the posted speed limit or general speed of other vehicles.
Backing up after missing an exit or turn.
Difficulty reacting quickly and/or processing multiple stimuli.
Problems with back/neck flexibility and turning to see traffic/hazards around the car.
Getting lost or disoriented easily, even in familiar places.
Failing to use turn signals or keeping signals on without changing lanes.
Increased “close calls” and “near misses.”
Receipt of two or more traffic citations or warnings in the past two years.
Dents and scrapes on their car or on surrounding objects where they drive and park at home, such as fences, mailboxes, garage doors and curbs.
So, bottom line, when your loved one starts to concern you, other family members and medical professionals in their lives, it is necessary to act. There are driving programs designed to test the ability of someone with cognitive and/or physical impairment. Mandated reporters, such as healthcare professionals and social workers are required to report impaired drivers. But anyone with a concern about someone’s capacity to continue driving can make an anonymous report to the department of transportation in every state.
For a complete list of state DOT sites check this page: https://www.transportation.gov/rural/dot-state-contacts
For the state of Florida, this link takes you directly to the reporting page: https://www.fdot.gov/safety/programs/impaired-driving.shtm
(updated 9/7/26)
To find out more about what steps to take if your family member needs to stop driving, click on the provided link.
Forbes tells us “When your aging parent is no longer able to keep track of bills, investments and money management, someone else must step in.” However, there are three common mistakes to avoid when that time comes. Stay tuned for next Blog: Is my loved-one safe to…---? Part Two – when should our older loved-one give up financial control?
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